Battle of El Itwil’do
somewhere in the Sinai, 1917
You are Captain Angus Young of the Queensland Fusiliers and you are deep in it.
Your commanding officer a pommie bastard named Sir David Evans wants more glory; at your expense. So he has ordered your unit to make an attack to take the well in the village of El Something-or-another thereby securing a forward supply of water for the upcoming campaign against Gaza and securing him the laurels of the damned uppy-de-ups.
He has you standing at attention in his tent.
“Captain Young”, he says in his high-pitched voice, “to continue our glorious advance against the Muslim hordes we are required to take the well and supply water for the troops, what. I have come up with a brilliant plan, I might add.”
Oh crickey, you think, now we are really in trouble!
Sir David continues, “We will do something the Turks and their German masters will not expect…a night attack. BY your expression, Young, I see it has surprised you also”
Surprised? You idiot!, your inner voice screams, night attacks are more trouble than…
Your train of thought is interrupted by his statement, “the attack shall not commence with the usual artillery as that will merely wake them up, what?”
No artillery?!”, you blurt out.
“No, Young, but we have a further surprise for the Turks”.
“Water pistols, sir?” you surmise.
“Water pistols? My good man, won’t do at all. They would not be effective without the water obtained at the wells. Not very militarily astute you Aussies, I see.”, he replies.
You merely wait.
“My ace card,” Sir David elaborates, “is the use of two tanks my cousin ‘obtained’ on route here. God knows where he got them from, but our gain, what?”
You finally zone out of his further comments. two tanks blindly going around in the dark. All the while your boys must attack, without artillery support, going against no doubt heavily guarded positions we have had no time to reconnoiter and under the command of this moron..
“Right. Attack starts at 04:00. Sir David says decisively hammering his pen upon his table. Dismissed”
It is 06:00, the sun is well up but orders were given at 04:00 to wait for the tanks. You have had the troops resting in the meantime. You restarting to think that perhaps Evans does have some notion that the moment has well passed omitting to tell you to stand down, while he formulated another of his clever plans.
You then hear the clank and rumble of heavy engines. The tanks are here.
As you stare at the iron monsters, an adjutant rides up primly to your station.
“Right, Young, your supports are here, you may begin your attack,” stated the waxed moustached officer.
You are dumfounded, but your inner voice calmly acknowledges that you were dreaming to think that daylight should interfere with Sir David bleeping Evans’ wishes.
“Well,” the mounted officer demands, “get on with it”
The Turks in their trenches with artillery in support. |
The Australian LMG company leapfrogs the infantry to continue the advance. |